On Friday after driving Mom to the airport in
SLC to fly back to AZ after her week in Utah, I stopped at the new Walmart in Providence to get a few things. I was totally amazed at all the people lined up to eat lunch at the nearby Rumbi Grill that had just opened that day. Who would do that? Is the food good enough to warrant an hour wait in the cold? I don't get it. Recently I came across a book of mine I hadn't looked through for awhile. It's called "Deep Thoughts" by Jack Handy. Here are some of my favorite. They are soooo random.
*When I found the skull in the woods, the first thing I did was call the police. But then I got curious about it. I picked it up, and started wondering who this person was, and why he had deer horns.
*If you're a cowboy, and you're dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet it would make you mad if you looked back and the guy was reading a magazine.
*If you go to a costume party at your boss's house, wouldn't you think a good costume would be to dress up like the boss's wife? Trust me, it's not.
*Most of the time it was probably real bad being stuck down in a dungeon. But some days, when there was a bad storm outside, you'd look out your little window and think, "Boy, I'm glad I'm not out in that."
*If you were an ancient barbarian, I bet a real embarrassing thing would be if you were sacking Rome and your cape got caught on something and you couldn't get it unhooked, and you had to ask another barbarian to unhook it for you.
*Instead of putting a quarter under a kid's pillow, how about a pine cone? That way, he learns that "wishing" isn't going to save our national forests.
*Somebody told me how frightening it was how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around the campfire and nobody got scared.
*I wish I had a dollar for every time I spent a dollar, because then, yahoo!, I'd have all my money back.
Anyway- that's it for today. Sometimes they seem funnier than other times. I guess it's just my mood. Hope you enjoyed them!